As a first time mom I had it all. We had a crib, a bassinet, a swing, a bouncer, a walker, an exersaucer, a pack-n-play, a carseat, a stroller, johnny jumper, and a baby bjorn. I had this tiny precious human and I just moved him from device to device because that seemed like that was the purpose. You have all these items, that were suggested from any baby registry. I would still hold him, but I also played pass the baby when others were around. That was just what was expected of me. Zayden and Zavier also were cared for basically the same way. Mainstream and sheepish.
When we moved to Germany in 2008, I eliminated all the baby gear to make less to move. When we had Zander in 2010 we had 2 bouncers, a boppy, a jumperoo, a playmat, and a crib. I also started practicing baby wearing to be close to him. I wasn't as dedicated to it as I am now, but it was a beginning. With Abbie, we got rid of the jumperoo and added a swing. Tony deployed when she was less than 4 weeks old and I knew that I would need to put her down to care for the others sometimes.
This time with Mason we have 1 bouncer, a boppy, a playmat, a walker, and a bed. But he spends so much time just being held by me. I'm amazed he's so mobile and pulls up so much already as he wasn't put down any more than he had to be. I still hold him just to go to sleep. He sleeps with me (which many of the kids have). He loves being next to me. I know so much more now as a mom that I wish I would have been encouraged from the beginning to just enjoy them as babies. Hold them, carry them, rock them to sleep. You can't get these first few months back.
Do what comes naturally to you and just comfort and sooth your little baby. Love them as much as you can as they really do grow so fast and that chapter of your life is over. I would sleep with all my kids now if they didn't wake each other up off and on all night long, and the bigger 2 maybe 3 are too cool for that.
One more thing, just talk to your baby like it's a real person. It is a real person. Right after Mason was born and as traumatic as it was for me (actual delivery), some of the first things I said to him were that I loved him and was so glad he was here, but I also recognized to him the pain he was likely in. Birth has got to be painful to be squished out. I told him I knew and I felt the pain too and just cuddled him.
Now when they become toddlers and up, that's a different sort of problems. But while they are little just hold them, show them the world while safely snuggled up against you.
Saturday, October 18, 2014
Monday, October 6, 2014
First ER visit in over 16 months
Finally had our first required ER visit since we moved to El Paso. It has been our first visit of any sort actually. I must say it went well and the fear I had of a quick and easily handling of the situation was not necessary. Zavier has been having trouble with his breathing after long outdoor exposures. He has a tree and grass allergy, and who knows what else wasn't tested for. He had 2 breathing treatments and an x-ray too make sure it was just allergy related. He was given a few more treatments for the next few days hopefully to strengthen his body enough to not be on med permanently.
Now to decide if I eventually want to follow up with an on post appointment. Which right now would mean dragging all 6 kids into the dr. so that's still up in the air.
Now to decide if I eventually want to follow up with an on post appointment. Which right now would mean dragging all 6 kids into the dr. so that's still up in the air.
Wednesday, September 10, 2014
When you know better you do better
I always feel like I'm judged on the choices I make as a parent. I feel like I've come so far since I became a mom almost 12 years ago. I had no idea what to expect going into parenthood. I had no idea what the future would look like and how my family would end up. I went along with the main stream and just did what everyone else did. I circumcised, vaccinated, supplemented with formula and just went along with what others did. I never understood why someone wouldn't do those things. Certainly if they didn't do those they were just being difficult.
It wasn't until Zander came along that things really started to change for me. With each of my previous hospital births I felt forced while vulnerable to get some IV drugs, even when I said I didn't want them or to be offered them. When a woman is down there isn't much she won't do to get through the trek of child birth. Even now as an advocate for natural/unmedicated/homebirth deliveries if someone said this will take all your pain away with no side effects I'd likely be all over that. But back to Zander I finally made it through with nothing but forced IV fluids, and then after delivery I was forced a bag of pit (likely with something else mixed in because of the effects it had on me). That was it I knew then that I wanted something better. Then on my birth plan I had asked that they wait an hour to vaccinate him (for that really really necessary Hep B). We switched rooms before he was given it and the mother/baby unit didn't know anything about it. I didn't force it and went on. After we left and we went in for his appointments I knew I just couldn't watch him suffer from the pain. And that is where my research began.
What was the purpose of this vaccine? Was my newborn running the risk of catching this disease? What side effects were there to this vaccine? Something about vaccinating didn't feel right and I was going to figure out what that was and why. The information out there is amazing. I'm far from alone in my journey to keep my kids safe and healthy without a vaccine. There are others out there like me and most have spent tons of time researching and weighing their choices just like I have.
I wanted to add in here because I can't finish this today because Mason is asking for me is this.
The overall health of my children and my family is amazing since we stopped vaccinating and therefore stopped monthly treks to the doctors's office. For as many children as I have we have maybe 3-4 illnesses a year (colds, 24 hour bugs, 5ths disease). My younger 2 have had no ear infections or symptoms requiring a check up.
I will be back to finish eventually.
It wasn't until Zander came along that things really started to change for me. With each of my previous hospital births I felt forced while vulnerable to get some IV drugs, even when I said I didn't want them or to be offered them. When a woman is down there isn't much she won't do to get through the trek of child birth. Even now as an advocate for natural/unmedicated/homebirth deliveries if someone said this will take all your pain away with no side effects I'd likely be all over that. But back to Zander I finally made it through with nothing but forced IV fluids, and then after delivery I was forced a bag of pit (likely with something else mixed in because of the effects it had on me). That was it I knew then that I wanted something better. Then on my birth plan I had asked that they wait an hour to vaccinate him (for that really really necessary Hep B). We switched rooms before he was given it and the mother/baby unit didn't know anything about it. I didn't force it and went on. After we left and we went in for his appointments I knew I just couldn't watch him suffer from the pain. And that is where my research began.
What was the purpose of this vaccine? Was my newborn running the risk of catching this disease? What side effects were there to this vaccine? Something about vaccinating didn't feel right and I was going to figure out what that was and why. The information out there is amazing. I'm far from alone in my journey to keep my kids safe and healthy without a vaccine. There are others out there like me and most have spent tons of time researching and weighing their choices just like I have.
I wanted to add in here because I can't finish this today because Mason is asking for me is this.
The overall health of my children and my family is amazing since we stopped vaccinating and therefore stopped monthly treks to the doctors's office. For as many children as I have we have maybe 3-4 illnesses a year (colds, 24 hour bugs, 5ths disease). My younger 2 have had no ear infections or symptoms requiring a check up.
I will be back to finish eventually.
Tuesday, June 3, 2014
10 days
Until we sign for the new house. I'm excited because once I knew we were moving I started packing. So we've been living with a mound of boxes for a month now and I'm ready for it to be over. I can't feel settled when I know change is coming so I've been packing.
The kids finished up 1st, 3rd and 5th grade last week and are ready to move up. They all seem to have mastered what I wanted to see from them. They are enjoying a little break since we're moving. Otherwise we would have jumped right back in to the next school year so we could take a break when Tony goes to school in the fall.
Mason turned 3 months old last week and weighs in at whopping 16lbs. He did amazing fighting off a sickness the rest of us had with just a tiny cough. He's ready to take on the world and have a lot more stimulation. I feel bad but I only know so much to say to a 3 month old. He will smile at his siblings. He jabbers up a storm (when in a good mood). He's trying very hard to roll over and for a little boy who doesn't spend much time laying on the floor he's almost there. We have only tile downstairs so even with his playmat it's not soft enough for long play. Yesterday he scooted completely off the mat and was just laying on the tile floor. I was sitting with him but he was so quick.
This upcoming weekend we will be celebrating Zayden's 9th birthday. His birthday isn't until the 12th, but that is the day before we sign for the house and we want to finish getting everything packed that day so that we can start taking loads over at signing. His presents are all here and most of them are wrapped. Poor kid always gets a move around his birthday. In 2008, 2010, 2013, and now 2014. Hoping this will be the last move for at least 2 years, but I had so much fun moving last summer from WA to TX, I'm ready when the orders say so.
The kids finished up 1st, 3rd and 5th grade last week and are ready to move up. They all seem to have mastered what I wanted to see from them. They are enjoying a little break since we're moving. Otherwise we would have jumped right back in to the next school year so we could take a break when Tony goes to school in the fall.
Mason turned 3 months old last week and weighs in at whopping 16lbs. He did amazing fighting off a sickness the rest of us had with just a tiny cough. He's ready to take on the world and have a lot more stimulation. I feel bad but I only know so much to say to a 3 month old. He will smile at his siblings. He jabbers up a storm (when in a good mood). He's trying very hard to roll over and for a little boy who doesn't spend much time laying on the floor he's almost there. We have only tile downstairs so even with his playmat it's not soft enough for long play. Yesterday he scooted completely off the mat and was just laying on the tile floor. I was sitting with him but he was so quick.
This upcoming weekend we will be celebrating Zayden's 9th birthday. His birthday isn't until the 12th, but that is the day before we sign for the house and we want to finish getting everything packed that day so that we can start taking loads over at signing. His presents are all here and most of them are wrapped. Poor kid always gets a move around his birthday. In 2008, 2010, 2013, and now 2014. Hoping this will be the last move for at least 2 years, but I had so much fun moving last summer from WA to TX, I'm ready when the orders say so.
Thursday, May 8, 2014
On the move again.
After living in this house for not quite a year we will be moving to a different house in El Paso. We weren't sure what we were going to do at lease renewal, but with a $10 rent increase it was answered for us. We only have 3 bedrooms and a loft here and we really need the 4th bedroom to be enclosed. When we selected this house last year it was our second choice as well as $75 above the budgeted amount we wanted to spend and we didn't know Mason was coming. We got on the housing list before we arrived at Bliss last year, but didn't like the options given to us when we got here then. When I got the lease renewal I went in to just see what we could be offered if we choose to take an offer and we were offered a nice single family home in one of the nicer neighborhoods. We took it and will be moving in the middle of June.
While we could have stayed and paid more rent this house exceeds our housing money in the summers and we break even during the winter. But we just decided having a 4th complete bedroom was what we needed. We have yet to decide what the exact split will be of the kids and if Mason's bed will still fit in our room. However Tony and I are both just excited that we're still moving together and will be together.
Tony is out in the "field" during training exercises and has been for the last few weeks. He was able to come home last weekend which happened to be his birthday. Having decided that we were moving before he came home changed our plans of do nothing (relaxing and celebrate his birthday) to get some stuff to paint and buy boxes so I can pack. But we had the most amazing weekend. We just spent the whole thing together and it was so nice. It really was a renewing weekend for us that usually doesn't happen on the weekends.
His big birthday gift was a grill/smoker/roaster and he very much enjoyed getting it set up and grilling on it. We actually just sat outside Sunday evening being together him, the kids, and me. We ate some food and goofed around. It was down time we don't usually get to take with all the crazy stuff in life.
Now I'll be packing until he gets back, we'll fix some painting issues in the house, clean it and move to our new house together. 5 weeks until we move.
While we could have stayed and paid more rent this house exceeds our housing money in the summers and we break even during the winter. But we just decided having a 4th complete bedroom was what we needed. We have yet to decide what the exact split will be of the kids and if Mason's bed will still fit in our room. However Tony and I are both just excited that we're still moving together and will be together.
Tony is out in the "field" during training exercises and has been for the last few weeks. He was able to come home last weekend which happened to be his birthday. Having decided that we were moving before he came home changed our plans of do nothing (relaxing and celebrate his birthday) to get some stuff to paint and buy boxes so I can pack. But we had the most amazing weekend. We just spent the whole thing together and it was so nice. It really was a renewing weekend for us that usually doesn't happen on the weekends.
His big birthday gift was a grill/smoker/roaster and he very much enjoyed getting it set up and grilling on it. We actually just sat outside Sunday evening being together him, the kids, and me. We ate some food and goofed around. It was down time we don't usually get to take with all the crazy stuff in life.
Now I'll be packing until he gets back, we'll fix some painting issues in the house, clean it and move to our new house together. 5 weeks until we move.
Friday, April 18, 2014
10 years and life
On Wednesday Tony and I celebrated 10 years of marriage. It seems like so much longer than that, but only 10 (plus the 2 1/2 before were married). It is also 10 years of military service for Tony this month. He'll be celebrating that in the field next week. It has been a wild and crazy ride and sometimes I forget to slow down and enjoy the moments. We have 6 amazing, happy and healthy children. We have a wonderful commitment to each other. We have stable lives with an income we can live on. I love the place we are in life and I need to slow down and just live in the moments instead of waiting for the next big thing. However I am excited to spend the rest of my life with my husband raising our family the best that we can.
This week we have been working on potty training Abbie. Whoever said girls were easier was full of it. It took us longer to get her to even pee on the toilet than any of the 4 previously potty trained boys. However we are now on day 4 and things are getting better. She is in underwear at the house and will go willingly on the toilet. She is still catching on to her body cues, but so am I and then I can help her avoid an accident. We still haven't gotten her to poop on the potty, but hopefully that will be coming soon. The biggest challenge will be finding her pants to wear since she is so skinny. And for dresses underwear are too revealing for Tony or I to feel comfortable out in just a dress.
This week we have been working on potty training Abbie. Whoever said girls were easier was full of it. It took us longer to get her to even pee on the toilet than any of the 4 previously potty trained boys. However we are now on day 4 and things are getting better. She is in underwear at the house and will go willingly on the toilet. She is still catching on to her body cues, but so am I and then I can help her avoid an accident. We still haven't gotten her to poop on the potty, but hopefully that will be coming soon. The biggest challenge will be finding her pants to wear since she is so skinny. And for dresses underwear are too revealing for Tony or I to feel comfortable out in just a dress.
Sunday, April 13, 2014
Taking a school break
After much deliberation I finally decided that the kids and I would take a 4 week break from school. We had only taken 1 whole week off since we started school in September. It has also given me time to work on next year's curriculum. I have most of it figured out except the English and History.
For English I'm trying to find a program they can mostly do by themselves as well as one we can afford times 3. Many get quite expensive and then you have to pay for the teacher's guide which confuses me. If I could see the curriculum I could decide if I needed the teacher's guide or not. However since I have to order online it is hard to get a good feel for the layout and requirements. I do not like the books we used this year for English and Zavier didn't even have an English curriculum as a first grader his was mostly encompassed in other stuff. I also don't want to go to cheap and end up with having to supplement their learning as English is something I don't want them to fall behind in.
For History I would love something that has visuals, e-books and cd's. I do think that is out there I just need to figure out what it is and if we're interested. I read to the kids daily when the littles go down for nap so I need something that can be read on the ipad since I sit in the dark and sometimes have to juggle nursing or just cuddling Mason or Abbie. Also being able to listen to info in the car would be nice. The kids enjoy listening to books on CD. I would also prefer the interesting parts of History and not the droning on of boring stuff. I know if I'm bored with it the kids are even more bored and that's no fun.
We have 5 weeks left after we return at the end of April to finish out this year and then we will jump into next year starting in June with another month off in September. It gets pretty warm here so doing outside stuff during the summer is exhausting so we'll school all summer and then take more breaks in the winter/cooler season to maximize our outdoor activities.
Baby Mason is growing like a weed. He's about 3lbs from doubling his birth weight and he's only 6 weeks. The kids have all done well adapting to having him in the house. The hardest part for me is cooking as he seems to want to be held or nurse every time I go to cook a meal. He will occasionally let Tony or Zachary hold him so I can get it ready, but then I'm usually stuck eating over his head. Last night I ate spaghetti over his head. He is a big cuddle bug. He sleeps pretty well at night as long as we're snuggled up. Which as long as he's sleeping I can handle. Tony is getting ready to go to a little over a month in the field so Mason will have his own half of the king size bed. Now if I could just get Zander and Abbie to stay in bed all night and sleep until 7 we'd be set.
The big kids are enjoying the break from school, but I do think that they are a little bored as the fighting has increased. They have gotten to play the xbox more since that is something that we usually never allow as we prefer they play outside or with hand on toys.
Abbie turned 2 on the 1st of April. We had a nice family party for her where she got her girly dress up clothes and her fun girly toys. However the boys love playing with her girly toys and will fight her for them. She's a very naughty little girl as she is constantly getting into things she's not supposed to. Like all day long we get her out of stuff. Everyone in the house is tired of getting her out of things. She's quite the little talker though and she's so cute. She says her ABC's and counts skipping a few letters or numbers, but pretty well. She really is a fun change of pace from the boys (other than the constantly getting into stuff). She pretty smart so we no longer can out smart her with putting things up or locking cabinets. Although we do have our glass cabinet tied with a green army sock. Her hair is really starting to grow out and we need to get her more used to having a clip or a top knot to keep it out of her eyes. I keep telling her when it starts getting in her eyes she'll have to have something in her hair all the time to keep it out.
For English I'm trying to find a program they can mostly do by themselves as well as one we can afford times 3. Many get quite expensive and then you have to pay for the teacher's guide which confuses me. If I could see the curriculum I could decide if I needed the teacher's guide or not. However since I have to order online it is hard to get a good feel for the layout and requirements. I do not like the books we used this year for English and Zavier didn't even have an English curriculum as a first grader his was mostly encompassed in other stuff. I also don't want to go to cheap and end up with having to supplement their learning as English is something I don't want them to fall behind in.
For History I would love something that has visuals, e-books and cd's. I do think that is out there I just need to figure out what it is and if we're interested. I read to the kids daily when the littles go down for nap so I need something that can be read on the ipad since I sit in the dark and sometimes have to juggle nursing or just cuddling Mason or Abbie. Also being able to listen to info in the car would be nice. The kids enjoy listening to books on CD. I would also prefer the interesting parts of History and not the droning on of boring stuff. I know if I'm bored with it the kids are even more bored and that's no fun.
We have 5 weeks left after we return at the end of April to finish out this year and then we will jump into next year starting in June with another month off in September. It gets pretty warm here so doing outside stuff during the summer is exhausting so we'll school all summer and then take more breaks in the winter/cooler season to maximize our outdoor activities.
Baby Mason is growing like a weed. He's about 3lbs from doubling his birth weight and he's only 6 weeks. The kids have all done well adapting to having him in the house. The hardest part for me is cooking as he seems to want to be held or nurse every time I go to cook a meal. He will occasionally let Tony or Zachary hold him so I can get it ready, but then I'm usually stuck eating over his head. Last night I ate spaghetti over his head. He is a big cuddle bug. He sleeps pretty well at night as long as we're snuggled up. Which as long as he's sleeping I can handle. Tony is getting ready to go to a little over a month in the field so Mason will have his own half of the king size bed. Now if I could just get Zander and Abbie to stay in bed all night and sleep until 7 we'd be set.
The big kids are enjoying the break from school, but I do think that they are a little bored as the fighting has increased. They have gotten to play the xbox more since that is something that we usually never allow as we prefer they play outside or with hand on toys.
Abbie turned 2 on the 1st of April. We had a nice family party for her where she got her girly dress up clothes and her fun girly toys. However the boys love playing with her girly toys and will fight her for them. She's a very naughty little girl as she is constantly getting into things she's not supposed to. Like all day long we get her out of stuff. Everyone in the house is tired of getting her out of things. She's quite the little talker though and she's so cute. She says her ABC's and counts skipping a few letters or numbers, but pretty well. She really is a fun change of pace from the boys (other than the constantly getting into stuff). She pretty smart so we no longer can out smart her with putting things up or locking cabinets. Although we do have our glass cabinet tied with a green army sock. Her hair is really starting to grow out and we need to get her more used to having a clip or a top knot to keep it out of her eyes. I keep telling her when it starts getting in her eyes she'll have to have something in her hair all the time to keep it out.
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