Juggling 5

And that is just the kids. While I am usually pretty comfortable in my parenting I am beginning to wonder what the heck I am supposed to do with a few of these kids.

Zayden is one of my more challenging kids. The others are touchy feely dorks like me and their dad, but Zayden just isn't the same. It surprises others when I tell them he is my most difficult to deal with. It is like he's too old for his age. While still constantly competing against Zachary. He acts completely annoyed that I am his mom. Like he would rather be parented by someone else. When Tony is around it is much more balanced but it isn't like Zayden is good for Tony either. I feel my little boy being completely different than what he used to be. I don't think there is a problem just that I feel like I miss him. He was such a cuddle bug and he loved to work but now he is like an angry, grumpy old man. I want him to enjoy and be excited for life while maintaining a routine. I need something to excite him. I am just to boring. 

Then there is Zander. He is different in a different at than Zayden. He frustrates me everyday. He is such a fun loving little guy demanding yet go with the flow of 3 big brothers. He is his daddy's boy. He gets the biggest light in his eyes for his daddy. While that isn't weird it is certainly different at our house. The army has been pretty demanding of Tony when the older 3 were younger toddler age. While loving his daddy so much is different it isn't where my concerns lie. Hope I am just worrying about nothing. 

fun out of the sun

Yesterday while the kids were driving me crazy my friend called and said she was at a little fest in McKenna the neighboring little town. She said it was pretty empty and that I should bring the kids out to play on the bouncy stuff. My original plan was to get shower but this sounded like more fun. We ended up staying a little over 4 hours where he kids had a blast. The weather was amazing overcast and    comfortable. The boys spent lots of time catching grasshoppers, running around and playing on the bouncy things. We then brought Zachary's friend home for a few hours.
Last night all but Zander slept in my room. It makes me sad that he will not sleep anywhere else but in his bed. I would love to get some toddler cuddling in at night. I don't need every night just a few nights here and there.
Zander made it through Sunday school without Zachary this morning. We will be going back tonight for iGnite. Can't get enough church. Lol.

Burning up

Oh my word has it been hot this week. It has been in the 90's this week which wouldn't be so bad if we had an a/c. I truly don't mind heat when there is a/c. We stayed home both days just going with the flow of the heat. Abbie was quite bothered by the heat and slept much of yesterday. Today is only supposed to be in the 80's so much more bearable. We are just having a relaxing Saturday at this point. I know I have to get them out to do something today as Zander is going crazy being stuck in the house for 2 whole days.
I am missing Tony quite a bit since he has only been getting on at night and I must sleep when the kids do so I haven't been getting to talk to him.
School starts in 2 1/2 weeks and I am excited for the big boys to go. I am not looking forward to all the work that comes with sending the kids to school everyday, homework, lunches, less time for them to do their chores. I am also excited for quiet afternoons. I have been having Abbie nap when Zander does so that when school starts they can nap so I can get stuff done or catch a nap. Whatever I need that day. I wish I was able to handle all the kids at home and home school them because I do love each of my children very much but I just can't stay on a schedule to get school stuff done. I wouldn't mind keeping one home and using the online public school here in Washington. Just not sure I could keep up with the non-computer stuff. Hopefully one day I'll be able to school some of my children.
However so many boys is just constant fighting. This has been the worst summer so far. I mean I do have a lot going on and am alone most of the time with all the kids.
I feel like I am running in a hamster wheel  doing the same thing all day everyday. I miss Tony's help with the little things like putting away laundry and helping with bedtime and dishes. Now that I am doing those chores too I am too exhausted to stay on top of all my heavy cleaning. I haven't fallen too behind but let's say there are some things in the house that need cleaning.
Today I have sent the boys outside to burn off some energy. They are going crazy. Not sure where we are going today but we'll be going out to do something.
I wish I had more friends shoot any friends would work. My friends I hung out with before Tony left one moved and the other just stopped talking to me. Not sure what happened there but whatever. I prefer keeping to myself just like an adult conversation once in a while would be nice.

Zander turns 2.

Today my precious little boy turned two. I am pretty sure he is my last boy baby to turn two but only God knows that for sure. He unfortunately had to spend his birthday going grocery shopping, but we did eat lunch out before heading home where he refused to nap because he fell asleep in the car. Iced our "ball" cupcakes and did some chores around the house. Then I made him dinner, meatball subs, rice and green beans which he did a nice job eating. Then we had cupcakes. He blew out the candle and I tried to have him lick the icing off the bottom of the candle, but instead he bit it off. So I had to make him spit that out. He then ate his baseball cupcake. After cupcakes was presents. He got a Thomas the Train (but I hear it's not Thomas) from Grandma Lisa and then for me and daddy and siblings he got 2 monster trucks and a soccer/hockey set with nets, balls, and sticks. He was a bit unsure about unwrapping them, but his big brothers held back nothing in helping him dive right in. He also picked out a soccer ball/basketball/football set at the store today. If you can't see the theme it is sport stuff. This little boy loves balls and would even sit and watch sports with daddy before he left. Hoping Zander will keep that interest.

Funny Zander

While Zander doesn't talk too much he does still do some funny stuff. He has excema and it's been flaring in his joints with the heat that we've had. He has a spot on the top of his left elbow that is becoming raw and bleeding. Tonight I decided that I would put some cream on it and then a bandaid since I usually won't treat it for fear of him eating/licking the cream off. I put the cream on and then a bandaid so that overnight hopefully the cream would clear it up. Then I said to him that he could just leave that on while he was sleeping and it would be all better in the morning. Well he then begins pointing at it and making snoring noises. He then kept pointing at it and snoring. I put a long sleeve shirt on him so that he wouldn't pick it off, but he was so funny with his snoring.
He does occasionally fake like he's sleeping and it's always with sound effects of him snoring.

keeping busy

Well I've been keeping a little more busier than normal since mom left and it's done well for me. I am going a bit crazy because I've missed Tony the last 2 times he got online so I haven't talked to him for a week now. Took Abbie to the dr today. She had a few boughts of screaming like she was in pain last night so I wanted to make sure she was good to go. She checked out beautifully. She weighed 13lbs 11oz dressed and was 24 inches long. I weigh and measure her periodically at home and those were both right on with our at home calculations. The dr said she looked great and was very responsive and alert. Almost as if she was more alert than most.
She is certainly the princess at the house and I think she already uses that to her benefit. She's still such a good little baby and I am continually amazed by her. She does have spells of being fussy, but it's usually just because she is ready for the next step in her cycle sleep/eat/poop/play repeat repeat repeat all day long. Then she sleeps all night quite consistently still. She is beginning to enjoy a little co-sleeping more especially for naps. She will occupy herself with her play mat or bouncer toys during her playtime and prefers to be laying on the floor over being held sometimes.
I didn't know what my relationship with my daughter was going to be like. I never truly expected to have a girl and then I didn't know what parenting her would be like once I knew she was a girl. I still had my doubts and even after she was born I asked if she was still a girl while she was laying on my chest after birth. I didn't know how much I needed a little princess until I got Abbie. She lights up my world every single day. I feel so blessed to have her.
I have never quite liked the little girls with the super high pitched voices. I always thought "how does a mother stand that". And other than when we're at church I think Abbie's super high pitched little jabbering is adorable. She is such a girl and has so much to say. She has a select few number of people that she lets hold her so I do sometimes wonder what I am getting myself into since Zander is also like that, but I am just so amazed by her.
I still absolutely love my boys just as much as Abbie, it's just different just like my love for each boy is different.
I'm very excited to get some more one on one time with Zander when school starts. He's such a mess and so fussy at times, but hopefully being the "big" brother in the house this school year will get him settled a bit. He's possibly got some speech delay, but I hear a new word almost everyday. He loves balls and can point out which is which of the 4 he knows. He knows enough words to get what he wants about 60% of the time, but the bigger boys still torment him until he's screaming and fighting back so having the bigger boys in school will solve that problem. If he spills something he almost always tries to clean it up and then he puts whatever he used back where he got it. Like towels/rags he gets out of the drawer himself and puts them back after he's cleaned up his mess.
Zander is starting to do better with others caring for him. He still tucks his head away when initially addressed, but will warm up to several different people at this point. He allowed a guy at church to take him to the playground with out me or a brother last week, but I think that was more his desire to go outside to play instead of going to church. He had a babysitter today for a little bit. She said it took several minutes of playing hide and seek to get him out of his bed. He is quite moody when he wakes up and that can sometimes be the worst part of his day. Parenting him pushes my buttons some days but when his little smile lights up you can see he's full of trust from his momma.
I'll have to find time to come back and post about what's going on with the older 3 cause I'm tired now, but rest assured there isn't much rest for a "single" mother of 5. :)

dressing a girl

What I have learned dressing a girl is that their clothes can last longer than boys. When she out grows a dress it becomes a shirt, when she out grows pants they become capris. You can't do that kind of dressing with a boy, when clothes are outgrown they look silly wearing them again. I wanted to do baby legs with Zavier and Zander, but couldn't get it to look quite right with their outfit, but I can with Abbie. I got a good deal on some cute baby legs so she has about 6 pairs. Right now we're in a heat wave so she's not wearing them this week, but they will last her a long long time. She is already filling out her 3 months clothes and is ready to move into her 6 month stuff. I measured her today and she weighs about 12 1/2lbs and is 24 1/4 inches long. Mom thinks she is small for 3 months, but I wanted her to be petite. I will hopefully be able to get her in for a well child check up when the big boys go back to school in the fall.

Mom has been here almost 2 weeks. It has been nice having another adult around, but my mom and sister expect entertainment when they are here so we have left the house about 10/12 days so far. Today she is at the library with the older 3 since Abbie cries when I leave her. I don't know how she's so quick to know but she is and Zander cries when he's the only one left at home so she took the older 3 and I kept the babies. I haven't gotten much accomplished since she left, but I am working on potty training Zander so I did spend about 20 minutes in the bathroom with him and then bathed him when he pooped his pants. We're still a long way from being close to potty training, but his skin is so sensitive he often ends up with a rash from foods he eats. So this time potty training is a must so that he can heal.

Well Abbie says it's time to eat and I'm going to start lunch for the big boys upon their return.