So the big secret... baby number 5 is coming in April. While I was almost instantly excited all the nay-sayers really bring down ones joy and excitement about a new baby. I am now 18 weeks tomorrow and am very excited to get through this last pregnancy. I really wanted to blog the whole thing because it has certainly been a crazy emotion filled ride so far that I wanted to remember everything about this one. The biggest difference with this one so far is the amount of time I have spent sick. I can't remember how much time I spent sick with Zander, but I am pretty sure it wasn't this long and his was quite tolerable. I nearly went days with almost no food, because any food made me feel sick. I even went as far as to get prescription meds for nausea this time. I lost some weight and last check I hadn't gained any back, but at least now I eat. I still eat too much or the wrong thing and then feel sick for many hours afterwards. Even tonight I feel sick and all I ate was a corned beef sandwich 3 1/2 hours ago. And it's given me an edge of heart burn.
While not suffering I do get really excited about this baby. While not sure how I'm going to handle having 5 kids by myself since Tony will deploy within the same time frame as the baby is due. I just feel unsettled here. I don't really like the house and I can't keep up with it. I just need to declutter, but I don't seem to know how. where do you put things you might need later? I know I probably don't need all the things I think I do, but I do try to throw stuff out occasionally.
I'm also really worried about being out here all the way away from family while Tony is gone. I know I was further in Germany, but I had tons of friends there. I could always find someone to do something with, but out here I haven't been able to find that. I have a few people I know and a few friends, but everyone here is so busy because of the difference in lifestyle compared to those in Germany who didn't have as much going on.
I miss my hubby right now while he's away at NTC. I do enjoy the quiet time I have in the evening after the kids are in bed. Not that he ever doesn't let me do what I want, but it's just different. The house does stay a bit more picked up, but not much.
Our ultrasound for the baby isn't until Dec 2nd. So I have until then to decide if I want to know the sex or not. I would really love to wait, but I think the anxiety just might eat me alive if I don't go ahead and find out.
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