A little better

Today is a little better. I got to have bible study with Staci and even though we didn't work on our study we did get to talk about me moving and getting help. I wish Tony was here to help me work this out but I really trust that God will help me through this. I do wish Tony would come along so we could talk about it.

Freaking out

I got a courtesy call this morning from the rental company that the owners are coming back to take the house in January some time. We recently came down on orders to Ft.Bliss Texas in July. We were planning to leave here late June when the kids get out of school to head down there. We only needed a house to stay in until then. I am having a panic attack. I don't know where or when or how to move and even less by myself with 5 kids. AND the most important thing to me is for Zavier to finish kindergarten where he is. He is doing so much better than I expected at all. He is thriving not just surviving like I expected. I am crushed by the thought of moving him. They are trying to get the owners to hold off until February so that Tony can come home first, but I don't know even what the best choice is. It's almost like we should pack most stuff and live with minimum stuff so were ready to go to Texas. I am leaving this up to God to help me and to Tony to tell me what to do.
I don't want to do this alone. :(

My Zayden

I love this little boy to pieces, but he makes so crazy. He really wants to get a rise out of of me all the time. Everything I say to him he has to say no to. I have started a Bible study with some local church friends and I am hoping I will learn some new coping devices to relate and teach him. He seems so angry in his heart and I want him to feel truly loved. He just needs to do some boy things with his dad so we are really excited for daddy to come home. He is so far not having any trouble in school that I know of. His teacher didn't seem to friendly when we went to have lunch at the school the last few times so I can't really get a read on things. Parent teacher conferences will be in early November so I will really have a better plan by then.